I was surprised to discover just how critical a role inspiration played in my leadership success and failure. I also entered into most of these positions of leadership believing that I was not a particularly inspiring kind of person to others. As a result, I shied away from those elements of leadership which were related to it. "Not my style of leadership," I would say to myself.
Huge mistake.
I had it in my head that "Charismatic Leadership" was only one style of leadership (which is true), was driven largely by charismatic inspiration (arguably true), and therefore inspiration was not a required element for successful leadership (oops).
What I'd missed, somehow, are some of the incredibly non-flamboyant ways in which inspiration sets its roots. Inspiration comes from a variety of sources, and it's not always about pep talks.
For example, showing up to every event put on by the group is inspirational; it shows how much you care about the events, the organization, and folks notice. Consciously or not, they are inspired to emulate that kind of dedicated behavior. It is, like it or not, the stuff that makes up a role model. And it's part and parcel of being a leader.
Showing up on time is also inspirational. Again, it says you care about the event and the group; that it is important to you. Your actions speak louder than your words. Count on it.
Putting your back into the work inspires others to do the same.
Making sacrifices for the group inspires others to do the same.
I presume by now you see the pattern I'm driving toward. There's an old cliché: Lead by example.
I picked up a corollary rule of thumb from someone along the way: An organization tends to take on the traits of its leader.
I missed the boat, hugely, by failing to apply both of these related snippets of wisdom to my work in and on the organizations of which I was in charge.
Take my band, for example. I talked a good job about wanting us to get gigs; but I never did the legwork to manifest them, and often failed to follow up on leads which were dropped in my lap. What few gigs we got in the latter years were due to the work of other members of the band. Even tasks they assigned me, as part of their already doing the bulk of the work, would fall to the wayside, left for someone else to pick up, or they would go until the last minute panic set in.
Idiotically, I took that as a sign that my bandmates needed to step up their involvement in the band. What I failed to realize is that I was essentially stating, in the most universal terms possible, that I wasn't actually concerned about gigs or money or publicity. This, slowly, over time, and probably subconsciously, demotivated my bandmates about all things related to the band.
Instead of inspiring the band to work harder at getting gigs, I was like a Demotivator poster child, sucking the life out of their enthusiasm. If the leader can't be bothered to work for gigs, why should anyone else?
This effect trickles down to everything else if left unchecked. Eventually, it eroded my bandmates' interest in new material. Then rehearsal priority shrank. Eventually there was very nearly nothing left.
Without the involvement of its members, a group dies. And it starts with the leader failing to inspire them to work for the organization.
The pattern held in all organizations I ever tried to run. And I was absolutely blind to it.
There's another layer to this inspirational aspect of leadership, however, which I hadn't learned until very recently. Since I was pointedly ignoring anything to do with inspirational activity as a leader, I missed this critically important truth: People are inspired by those they respect. And another cliché enters the arena: Respect isn't demanded -- it is earned.
How much respect can you have for someone who won't show up for meetings on time? Won't show up for gigs on time? Won't show up for rehearsals on time? Won't memorize the parts he said last week, yet again, that he would memorize?
I should have seen it coming, too. It had become a serious frustration to me that I would be interrupted in the middle of sentences almost all the time; it was like nobody even considered that anything I had to say was of sufficient value to let me get a turn in the conversation, and when I did, I was simply overrun as if I had not been speaking.
Had I earned the band's respect, that would have been less of an issue. So it should have been a warning sign. But I missed it.
And so, one inescapable conclusion entered into my reflections: Part of being a leader is inspiring people; part of inspiring people is earning their respect; and part of earning respect comes from being responsible.
And the majority of problems I was having running these organizations came down to that simple concept: I was not being a responsible person. In every case, I built my house on an unstable foundation, and in every case, the house eventually collapsed.
Next up: Responsibility and Why It Matters